by admin on March 19, 2010
I often talk about how much I love it when Gabe laughs. Really, any kid laughing is great. They laugh without restraint. It’s a pure joy that is contagious. Gabe likes to laugh when we do crazy stuff, randomly when he walks down the hall, when he’s delirious. You know, the normal things that cause laughter. (What, you don’t laugh when you walk down the hall flailing your arms? Me either) My favorite laughter though is at the dinner table. The wife and I will be eating, talking, feeding the little man. Then something happens and we start laughing. Generally, it is something he has done. Without fail, he starts laughing hysterically. He gets this big grin, looks at both of us and laughs his head off. The best part? He has no clue what we are laughing at. He is completely unaware that it is the disgusting mixture of blueberries combined with chicken and gravy, topped off with smushed peas, all being rubbed into his hair with reckless abandon, that is causing us to laugh. Or it could just be a joke that one of our colleague’s told earlier in the day. (side not: colleague sounds like such an important word. I could have just used co-workers, but let’s give our friends some credit) My son, somehow, has turned into the guy who laughs at the joke without really getting the joke, but still laughs so that everybody thinks he gets the joke and won’t think he’s an idiot. How is he 13 months old, yet understands that you’ve got to “fake it to make it”? Did we teach him this? Has he seen us doing this? What is our baby-sitter teaching him? Will he ever “get” the joke? Did I really put Georgetown in the Elite Eight? Sorry, wrong topic. Sore topic.
Go make your kid laugh at something they don’t understand. It’s fun for the whole family.
*as always, if you have a funny story/video/picture you’d like to share for Friday Funnies, send us an e-mail.
by kevin on March 17, 2010
There is a problem with my generation. We think we are supposed to win at everything. Every time. We are entitled to it. Owed success. If we lost a basketball game as a child, our parents would say something along the lines of, “It’s ok honey. It wasn’t your fault. You played your best. It’s ok. You’re still a winner.” What if I missed two free throws at the end of the game, with my team down by one point? What if I turned the ball over in the closing seconds? What if I let the ball go through my legs, allowing the other team to score the winning run? Is it the end of the world? Hardly. But the failure cannot be ignored. We say all too often that “winning is everything”, but those who have lived life at all know that isn’t true.
This is something I’ve thought a lot about, in hopes that my kids like to play sports. If they lose (and especially if something they did contributed to the loss) they need to know it. They need to hear, “Tough game, son. You guys played hard but it wasn’t enough. We’re gonna have to spend some more time on your free throws. Those two at the end were costly. Remember the sting of loss, but let’s move on, get to work and get better. One loss doesn’t ruin anything, but you’ve got to learn from it.” Too many people in my generation don’t know how to deal with failure. They have been shielded from any negativity in loss. When something goes wrong, they have a panic attack. Though they’ve worked for nothing, they feel like they are owed everything. Any kink in those plans is an injustice. Let’s be honest, life has its fair share of failures and disappointments to go along with the successes. Our kids have to realize both sides. As dad’s, it starts with us. Let our kids feel the sting of defeat. Let them feel what it’s like to let the team down. Let them learn from it. And as a result, let them enjoy the sweetness of hard-earned victory.
What do you think? Do we need to shield our kids from accountability in loss, or use that opportunity to teach?
